Monday, July 23, 2012

The Violence Inside

Fear of what caused someone to go and kill lots of innocent people this week cuts deep into our psyche . Tragedy triggers some irrational thoughts and responses . We all ask why, but some are too quick to state an explanation. To quick because cause is multifactede and those who truly seek it find more than the wannabes ever wanted to find . Even non religious people want to believe that we are rational and caring  but I  think the evidence is that neither the violent and the non violent are not wholly objective in response .We all have violence lurking within .  The worst response is not to see that inside us all are some very serious occasional violent thoughts that are under some control .
Another really poor projection is to call for better modelling by SOME people who often get angry and sin , because we all do both sometime .
Probably most dangerous of all is to condemn the sinner with the sin. To focus on those persons whose outward anger is more easily triggered,  is to potentially project the problem and not deal with the root causes . I have worked with enough very violent young people to know that one of the  triggers to great danger of  them " not caring"  is the blatant condemnation of their behaviour by others .If they don't know 1  person who really cares for them ( enough to get angry with them  up front and tell them the truth -) they are extremely dangerous !( And don't You say it doesn't happen ( with people afraid to stand up to anger with anger it happens alright- smoking guns everywhere !)

The short fuse angry man knows better than to blame a brain fade- that's the sort of armchair excuse you invent is you listen to the radio too much ,  are always solving other problems, and forget the real people who get angry with you in your presence . Anger is much more real than the calm talk ,  and dealing with it must be real . People need to show they really don't condemn the person because of their behaviour .  Have faith in people to change and You get angry too  because you care enough to try and shake them. The pathetic pursuit of  peace at all costs is VERY costly .
The danger for our society for  is for it  to create a deliberate determination to legislate brain fade  ( an excuse ) INSTEAD of handing out natural ( dummbies ignore adrenalin ) reality therapy :  seeing and accepting  the difference between condemning the sin and the also critical.    Theconfused and shallow thinking that welds the 2 together  is putting our families and school's and our work places at much greater risk than they should be .Mere description is  too simple !
Society is not better if everyone complies and is passive,  but if quite natural anger is expressed and observers take seriously the concerns of those who get angry . To smooth over is to create the nanny state pretence that all is well because " noone is getting upset " .
NO--- all is not well because what's smoothed over is about to erupt again -------like night follows day .

Players who see their team member's get mad can best help those players by accepting that the cause is probably fair enough ( anger is not a sin in western culture but it is increasingly seen as such amongst post moderns and determinist's who see nurture as the only issue .
Our society is clearly in a state of depression BECAUSE we are not allowed to show our anger , Michael Carr Greg is in denial , as are lots of people who refuse to see the popular rejection of old distinctions , "wrath is bad "ideas  and their placement of  roadblocks to emotional relief .
What this means is that partners with a longer fuse can condemn those with a shorter - not exactly progress and not exactly liberating .
Natural determination becomes natural condemantion - a very serious  matter that makes the person feel trapped and desperate .  Unpick the logic the idea before you try to remove the log out of someone else's eye . Your anger is real  too . We all best deal with it .learn the lessons the Master taught so well and so clearly.